Dating Duhs

It’s rather trying when you have to keep explaining to a date “How To Treat Me 101.” One example is Facebook etiquette, which never ceases to astound me. So, you mean you want to be in a relationship with me, but your Facebook timeline and history is still plastered with pictures of you cheek-to-cheek with your ex? And you don’t have any pictures of me, so you leave the general public to extrapolate?

Now, now, maybe I’m just being superficial (like so many of us California girls are). Who really cares what Facebook tells the world, as long as your heart is true. Or is it?

You say you want to leave your wife, but take absolutely no action.

You say you love me more than ________, but let’s face it, you guys are known to say whatever sounds good in the heat of the moment.

You say, you say, you say.

Don’t say it if you won’t do it. It sounds lame, and it’s just…so…tiring.

Perhaps mother never taught you? Just like tennis, follow-through is everything.

Date Read-ability

A romantic weekend and a good book. Two of my favorite items. But in combination?

Let’s see. A good book is a stand-alone party. Well, maybe not party, but groovin’ entertainment. Reading takes you places. I can get as lost in a book as I can in lovemaking. Reading is that good.

But a romantic weekend! The in-love feelin’, the snuggling, ga-ga eyes, reveling in each other, laughing, napping, feeling like it could never get any better than this. Yeah, we’ve all been there. Then comes Sunday. Time to go home. To reality.

The romantic weekend comes to an abrupt end, but the book is tangible – and we are still holding on to both.

The combination of reading a good book during a romantic weekend brings up some interesting scenarios.

• Is the Date so boring, so dull, that you must read to pass the time?
• Is your book so good, so titillating, that it surpasses Date in fantasy potential?
• Or, perchance, is Date co-reading the same book, so you can alternately pause and discuss? (Now I’ll pause to say that’s my fantasy – but those Dates don’t seem to exist on planet earth).

Giving me the freedom to read!

My Dating Friend, who amazes and dazzles me constantly, was able to finish a riveting adventure story, filled with unsettling portrayals of relationships, while on a romantic wine-tasting weekend. How does one do that? Instead of a cigarette, do you open right back to the page after a quick copulate? Or do you read while doing it, slow enough so you can turn the pages without ripping them?

I hope you, my readers, can shed some light on this. Or at least a booklight. Do tell.